Discussions in Jokes, Riddles and Funny Articles
Moderated By Administrator

Forums
Entertainment
Jokes, Riddles and Funny Articles
Totally Tasteless Jokes (May become obscene)
YOUR SETTINGSLIST FORUMSLIST TOPICSSEARCH

TOPIC: Totally Tasteless Jokes (May become obscene)

PRINT TOPICSEND THIS TO A FRIEND

Listing 11 to 20 of 107 Replies

PAGES: 11 1 2 3 4 5
TheShadowlord
RE: Totally Tasteless Jokes (May become obscene)

Member Since:
    October 2000


Ordo Ignis: Savant
RK: 14
MP: 7,202


RPGC MAIL USER EMAIL USER VIEW USER REGISTRY ADD USER TO BUDDY LIST
Monday July 23, 2007 11:23 PM
A young sailor came ashore, and as many people in his situation, felt the need to get laid. He walked through the seedy side of town looking for some ladies of negotiable affection. Having little money to his name, he is rather limited in his choice. The best brothels are bypassed until he comes to one rather poorly kept building with some suggestive advertisement outside.
"If I can't find a bargain here, I can't find it anywhere," he says to himself, and enters.

"Hello," says the receptionist.
"Hi. I'm on something of a budget here, what's the cheapest you have?"
The receptionist starts listing prices and names, and the young sailor finds the prices just a little too steep.
Finally, the receptionist says "Well, we have the $5 special..."
"I'll take it," the young man says, rather desperate to get any.
"All right. Just go through that door, down the stairs and straight ahead. Don't mind about the light being off and if she doesn't say much - most customers prefer it like that."
Wondering what could be so bad that you want to keep a woman silent and unseen, then shrugging and surrending to certain urges, the young man opens the door.

Some minutes later, he comes out again, looking a bit dissatisfied. The receptionist says nothing, but the man cannot help but comment. "It was...OK, I guess, but really, you have to get her to stop spitting on people."

Turning to the janitor of the brothel, the receptionist yells: "BIlly, the corpse in the basement's full again!"
REPLY
I feel happy...I feel happy!

"I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours."
- Stephen Roberts
 Message #318980 - This was a reply to message #318967
TheShadowlord
RE: Totally Tasteless Jokes (May become obscene)

Member Since:
    October 2000


Ordo Ignis: Savant
RK: 14
MP: 7,202


RPGC MAIL USER EMAIL USER VIEW USER REGISTRY ADD USER TO BUDDY LIST
Monday July 23, 2007 11:24 PM
And for those who like disturbingly dirty humor, there are these excellent sites

http://www.ghastlycomic.com/

http://www.sexylosers.com/

[[Edited by TheShadowlord on Monday July 23, 2007 11:25 PM]]
REPLY
I feel happy...I feel happy!

"I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours."
- Stephen Roberts
 Message #318981 - This was a reply to message #318980
SisqAlpha
RE: Totally Tasteless Jokes (May become obscene)

Member Since:
    April 2007


Ordo Aqua: Savant
RK: 5
MP: 953


RPGC MAIL USER VIEW USER REGISTRY ADD USER TO BUDDY LIST
Wednesday July 25, 2007 3:54 PM
I have to admit Shadowlord, that one was pretty bad. But not the worst I've ever heard. I've got one that makes that one pale. It's one of those that makes half the people laugh and pisses the other half off......the other half are usually women.


BE FOREWARNED: THIS JOKE IS OFFENSIVE. IF YOU CAN'T HACK IT, DON'T READ IT!





What's 18 inches long, stiff as a board, and makes women scream uncontrollably?







A victim of SIDS.





Don't hit me. I only posted it cause it was the most tasteless joke I ever heard.
REPLY
"Tuna and bread. Tuna and bread."-----

"Fuck tuna and bread. Star Trek is on."
-------------------------------------------------
"If everyone is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking." ~George S. Patton
 Message #319068 - This was a reply to message #318981
SisqAlpha
RE: Totally Tasteless Jokes (May become obscene)

Member Since:
    April 2007


Ordo Aqua: Savant
RK: 5
MP: 953


RPGC MAIL USER VIEW USER REGISTRY ADD USER TO BUDDY LIST
Thursday July 26, 2007 7:46 PM
OK, the last one was beyond horrible. feel free to boo and pillory. I did however hear a new joke on the radio today.


A guy was walking through golden gate park when he came across a man hugging a tree.
"What are you doing?" he asked the guy. "Listening to the music of the tree." the tree hugger replied. "Wanna try it?"
The guy, curiosity aroused, wrapped his arms around the tree and pressed his ear against the tree.
The tree hugger promptly placed handcuffs on him, robbed him, stripped off his clothes and left him handcuffed to the tree.

Pretty soon another man walked by and asked the guy "What happened to you?"
The handcuffed guy told him all that had happened to him and asked if he could help get him loose.
The other man said "That's terrible!" Then he walked up behind him, unfastened his belt and whispered in the guy's ear "This is your unlucky day."
REPLY
"Tuna and bread. Tuna and bread."-----

"Fuck tuna and bread. Star Trek is on."
-------------------------------------------------
"If everyone is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking." ~George S. Patton
 Message #319136 - This was a reply to message #319068
Darthwedge
RE: Totally Tasteless Jokes (May become obscene)

Member Since:
    May 2007


Membrum
RK: 2
MP: 394


RPGC MAIL USER VIEW USER REGISTRY ADD USER TO BUDDY LIST
Thursday July 26, 2007 7:51 PM
A man who had just died walked through the gates of heaven, an angel greeted him. The Angel said "Welcome to heaven, Let me show you around" Soon they came to the clock area where the angel explained what each clock is for.

"Every person has a clock, each time you tell a lie, the hand moves one hour."

They came to a dusty old clock where the angel said "This clock was Mother Theresa's, it has never moved"

They came to another where the angel said "This was Abraham lincoln's, it has moved twice"

The man who had just entered heaven said "Where is President Bush's?"

The angel replied "Thats in god's office, he uses it as a ceiling fan"
REPLY
Peace is but a shadow of death, desperate to forget its painful past. Though we hope for promising years, after shedding a thousand tears, yesterday's sorrow constantly nears. And while the moon still shines blue, by dawn it will turn a scarlet hue....

-Kuja FF9
 Message #319137 - This was a reply to message #319136
LibraRabbit
RE: Totally Tasteless Jokes (May become obscene)

Sweepsweek 2nd Place: Member has won 2nd place in a RPGC Sweepsweek.

Member Since:
    January 2005


Ordo Terra: Novice
RK: 6
MP: 1,252


RPGC MAIL USER VISIT USER HOMEPAGE VIEW USER REGISTRY ADD USER TO BUDDY LIST
Thursday July 26, 2007 8:59 PM
Tasteless jokes you say? Okay hear we go *cracks knuckles*

What is the difference between a Buick and a pile of 100 dead babies?
...
I don't have a Buick in my Garage.

****

What is worse then a pile of 100 dead babies?
...
The one at the bottom is eating it's way out.

****

What is small, red, and floating at the top of my pool?
...
Baby with slashed floaties.

****

What is small, green, and at the bottom of my pool?
...
Baby with slashed floaties a week later.

****

What's better then ten babies stapled to a tree?
...
One baby stapled to ten trees.

****

That should be good for now.
REPLY
"The road to peace is paved with tolerance"
 Message #319143 - This was a reply to message #319137
Max
RE: Totally Tasteless Jokes (May become obscene)

Member Since:
    February 2007


Ordo Terra: Novice
RK: 6
MP: 1,041


RPGC MAIL USER VIEW USER REGISTRY ADD USER TO BUDDY LIST
Thursday July 26, 2007 9:20 PM
Oh, no...dead baby jokes...

Those are, indeed, tasteless.

Here's a good one though:




What's the difference between Micheal Jackson and a Grocery Bag?


One's white, made of plastic, and dangerous for little children to play with, while the other is used to carry groceries.
REPLY
Work Hard, Play Hard, Live Hard,


but Love softly, and with All your Heart
 Message #319145 - This was a reply to message #319143
SisqAlpha
RE: Totally Tasteless Jokes (May become obscene)

Member Since:
    April 2007


Ordo Aqua: Savant
RK: 5
MP: 953


RPGC MAIL USER VIEW USER REGISTRY ADD USER TO BUDDY LIST
Friday July 27, 2007 5:47 PM
ROFL. All three of you. I don't feel QUITE so bad about my SIDS joke after reading Rabbit's post. Congratulations! You managed to offend my wife lol.
REPLY
"Tuna and bread. Tuna and bread."-----

"Fuck tuna and bread. Star Trek is on."
-------------------------------------------------
"If everyone is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking." ~George S. Patton
 Message #319189 - This was a reply to message #319145
Unbeliever
RE: Totally Tasteless Jokes (May become obscene)


Member Since:
    September 2005


Ordo Aer: Novice
RK: 9
MP: 2,514


RPGC MAIL USER VISIT USER HOMEPAGE VIEW USER REGISTRY ADD USER TO BUDDY LIST
Friday July 27, 2007 7:16 PM
QUOTED  What's better then ten babies stapled to a tree?
...
One baby stapled to ten trees.


That's the only one of those I really liked. That was great.

Still, Sisq's was so utterly horrible and tasteless I can't even bring myself to post one. I'd get stage fright trying to compete against a monster like that.

Also, I nearly died laughing when I read it. Is that bad?
REPLY
2011 was way more apocalypsey than 2012.
 Message #319199 - This was a reply to message #319189
TheShadowlord
RE: Totally Tasteless Jokes (May become obscene)

Member Since:
    October 2000


Ordo Ignis: Savant
RK: 14
MP: 7,202


RPGC MAIL USER EMAIL USER VIEW USER REGISTRY ADD USER TO BUDDY LIST
Friday July 27, 2007 10:57 PM
Only if you do it in front of people who lost a child to SIDS.
REPLY
I feel happy...I feel happy!

"I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours."
- Stephen Roberts
 Message #319212 - This was a reply to message #319199

Listing 11 to 20 of 107 Replies

PAGES: 11 1 2 3 4 5